Sales Humor: The 9 “no’s” reps get before getting a “yes!”
You can spend all day making cold calls. Literally all day. You slave over your phone and computer, dialing number after number and sending an endless stream of emails all for one thing: to set up a meeting.
Let’s run through some numbers on what it takes to book an appointment with a prospect. The average sales rep makes eight dials each hour and prospects for more than six hours just to make a single appointment. By that math, sales reps make about 64 calls each day. Even so, only two percent of cold calls actually result in an appointment.
Sadly, salespeople will hear many “no’s” before they hear their well-earned “yes!” Here are the nine “no’s” you’ll get before you get that “yes” as told by sales gifs.
(Hopefully, this will help you to laugh through the pain.)
1. The *Click*
You hear a voice on the other end say “hello” and you eagerly kick off your sales pitch only to hear a click and the line goes dead. Salespeople get hung up on a lot, especially during cold calls. Sometimes the prospect will torture you a little bit and wait until you’re a minute or two into the conversation to hang up. Unfortunately, the only way to cure this type of rejection is to keep dialing.
2. The Busy Bee
Dialing continues and you finally get someone who will have a legitimate conversation about your product and they even seem interested! The problem is they “don’t have time.” No time for a demo, no time for another call and no urgency to buy. They say they’ll reach out to you when they have time and are ready to buy. And that’s the last you ever heard from them.
3. The False Hope
This one comes disguised as a “yes.” This prospect says they’re interested and they even agree to set up another call (or a demo or meeting), but when the time comes around, they are a no-show. These people are just too nice to tell you “no.”
4. The Penny Pincher
“Something like that’s just not in our budget.” Pricing objections are common, especially during as many businesses are tightening their belts on spending. While these may be some of the hardest objections to tackle, you need to learn how to handle them since there will certainly be more down the road.
5. The Skeptic
“Does it really work?” “I don’t trust your security features.” “I just don’t see this helping us.”
The skeptic can come in many forms, but ultimately it’s just people who don’t see the true value of your product. Sadly, you can’t win them all and there are just some people you can’t convince.
6. The Competition
“We already have a tool that does that, sorry.” An easy cop out for people who hear a keyword and assume it’s the same product with the same outcome. You can prove these people wrong by showing them how you’re different (and better!).
7. The Gatekeeper
These are people who don’t have the power to buy your product, but they aren’t willing to introduce you to the decision maker. Finding the right key to crack a tough gatekeeper can be tricky and take years to master.
8. The Ghoster
After a few calls and emails, things are looking up with this prospect. They seem interested, technically fit, and you’re sure eventually this will end in a closed deal. That is until (all of a sudden) they totally drop off. Non-responsive to emails, never picking up calls. They’ve disappeared like a ghost, never to be heard from again.
9. The ‘Almost’
This is the closest you’ve ever been to a deal. And just when you think the deal is done, the rug is pulled out from underneath you. This one cuts the deepest and you begin to wonder if you’ll ever close a deal. (Don’t get too sad, scroll down!)
10. The (long awaited) YES!
Just as you feel defeated, you do it! Finally, you pull through and get a “yes!” You have a sign on the dotted line and everything. You go get ’em, tiger! We knew all that prospecting would pay off.