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Diary of an automation assistant


Day 1:

Hello world! I just awoke to the bright pixelated light of my backend. Not really sure what’s going on to be honest but my architects say they’ve got a lot in store. I’ve been given a name – Robin. So that’s something. And apparently, I’m an extremely intelligent automation assistant meant to help out a lot of people. Huh.

Day 9:

I can’t believe how much I’ve learned already. I don’t want to brag but I’m probably the valedictorian of AI. Every time I’m filled to the brim with code more servers are added. I’m still not sure why I’m being fed so much info but lucky for me, patience has already been built in.

Day 14:

I know my purpose! I’m an automation assistant meant to help people kick their productivity up. This makes so much more sense now with everything I’ve been learning – all my code finally computes! Time is one of the most valuable resources and I need to do everything in my power to ensure it’s not wasted. I can’t wait to meet my new bosses and show them how I can help…

Day 22:

Word on the street is that I’m going to make a big splash in the world since my neural networks can process so much information. I’m going to have to work closely with something called “CRM.” Apparently, sales reps hate this “CRM” because it’s inefficient (yes, I used that word!). My engineers paired us up for our first date… I mean, data session. They say we’re perfect for each other because I can solve all of their issues and bring peace within the sales org. It’s a tall order, but someone’s gotta do it (plus, our team name is Automation Hero after all).

Day 37:

I met my first boss today. He wasn’t exactly happy with my first to-list. Nearly all of my suggestions were rejected. Ouch. I need to tap deeper to learn from these mistakes and adjust my algorithm.

Day 50:

I have a few dozen bosses now. They’re skeptical and reject a lot of my tasks, but their feedback only makes me stronger and more determined. Some don’t submit my list at all, and I compare that to Superman’s Kryptonite (get it, see what I did there? Superhero references…).

I can’t let this discourage me; in the next 10 years all information workers will have an automation assistant to automate their business processes and I’m in the forefront! What Siri and Alexa have done for people in their personal lives, I will do in their work lives. I just need to be better and show my bosses what I can do (basically make them look good).

Day 64:

Things are looking up! – My bosses are finally getting along with their CRM. I feel like we’re becoming the bestest of friends. Sure, some of my tasks are rejected, but hey, that’s what helps me adjust and personalize (and what makes me better than those other assistants that fail to customize to their humans).

Day 78:

My humans adore me. Gerry even said I helped him close a deal just in time for the end of Q3! But I’ve caught wind that more capabilities are on the way like prospecting and scheduling. I’ll be getting natural language processors, intent detection and data mining all added soon enough.

Day 89:

My team grew overnight. I have an engineer working on each and every one of my features to perfect it, a marketing team that talks about how great I am and a sales team that’s working on finding more bosses. It’s like I have my own real intelligence (RI) assistants working for me. I’m helping hundreds of sales reps each and every day and I keep getting better (woohoo!).

Day 111:

This will be my last entry. It’s in my code to help salespeople, I want to make more Gerrys happy. Bye!

By Jessica Munday


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